Christmas is about the Virgin Birth. For those of us not lucky enough to have been blessed by the Angel of the Lord and wanting a second chance, there’s the artificial hymen. A bargain at just US$14.99 (or Suggest Your Price).
The product has so many advantages. It comes in discreet packaging — “Your Mum Will Never Know” promises the web site. “When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable.” The site is careful to remind us that there are lots of reasons besides rolling in the hay that a hymen may be broken. Among them “Childhood accident (Hard object)”. Hmmmm. The best news is that it comes in a two-pack. So Merry Christmas AND Happy New Year everyone.
Thanks to Broadsheet for this gem.