Can I get away with posting this e-mail from restaurant reviewer Giles Coren to the Times on the grounds that it has a blow job in it? Or that its author is a wanker (of which more tomorrow)?
Read. Enjoy. Remember never to e-mail your colleagues when you’ve had a few. Even if they have done the inexcusable and removed the indefinite article from the last line of your restaurant review. A taste:
2) I will now explain why your error is even more shit than it looks. You see, i was making a joke. I do that sometimes. I have set up the street as “sexually-charged”. I have described the shenanigans across the road at G.A.Y.. I have used the word ‘gaily’ as a gentle nudge. And “looking for a nosh” has a secondary meaning of looking for a blowjob. Not specifically gay, for this is soho, and there are plenty of girls there who take money for noshing boys. “looking for nosh” does not have that ambiguity. the joke is gone. I only wrote that sodding paragraph to make that joke. And you’ve fucking stripped it out like a pissed Irish plasterer restoring a renaissance fresco and thinking jesus looks shit with a bear so plastering over it. You might as well have removed the whole paragraph. I mean, fucking christ, don’t you read the copy?
Thanks to rival newspaper The Guardian for washing The Times’s dirty subbing in public. And to Sophie Campbell for the tip.